Maybe you heard, the American ice hockey team defeated the Russians in Sochi today (yesterday? Wtf time is it in Sochi?). 
Internationally this is a big deal because, well, it’s the Olympics… and the Cold War… and the 1980 Olympics… you get it; in my life this is a big deal because I come from a family of ice hockey players. My step-dad and my 3 brothers all play ice hockey year round and are super serious NHL fans, specifically, Toronto Maple Leafs and the LA Kings. We are French Canadian too.
My family happened to be in the city, and I planned to meet up with them in the afternoon/evening to go to a hockey party, where I was going to meet my daily quota and mac it to some sexy Ice King. Seriously, hockey men are hot! They are fierce and strong as hell and often have no idea just how irresistible they are with their rosy cheeks and sweaty hair. In my limited experience, I also find them to have a certain sincerity and shyness that is endearing- especially given how brutishly they behave on the ice. Meow!
We spent the afternoon at MoMA- I don’t think I have ever been to a museum with my parents before, and talking about art with them is a little strained because I can be really intense about it and they are sort of simple and surface-y about it. No matter. I did make some eyes with some cuties at the museum, chatted it up with an artist I met there, but didn’t make the moment for day 2 mission to pop off.
Wearing leather pants with wild hair and a heavily lined eye is nothing in NYC, but for the hockey players at this party, and my mother, it may have been a bit novel since many came from Canada and upstate New York regions. I was trying to stack the deck a bit given I knew something of the challenges I would face at the hockey party: my family men, a dozen tv’s, and an open bar with sliders and poutine.
This party was giving me anxiety. There were like 6 men here, 5 of which are married, the other is my baby brother. I’m considering leaving early to use one of my really effective alternative strategies: Starbucks, a 12 step meeting, or the L train. I notice my oldest brother coming up the stairs and suddenly my huntress focus sharpens and brightens: my brother brought his friend Sonny. The ladies of the stands refer to Sonny as ‘Yummy’ because it sort-of rhymes and he is edible in every way- sugary sweet, chivalrous, 6’4 and pure lean muscle with paws that could crush a skull and the face of… Michael Bolton. Trust me, it works. Family members had mentioned Yummy to me before, trying to set my sights on him, but I was here, he was there, I was still rolling around with my former lover, it was the wrong time. Tonight felt right, and I tried to give Yummy the signals when we spoke- we hugged, I was smiley, interested in him, but it appeared that I scared the shit out of him.
For the record I am not giving up on him, nor am I giving up on my office building crush, nor Michael Fassbender.
As the party filled out to a more respectable number, there was another man I feasted my eyes on but I seemed invisible to him. I had about an hour before I had to meet a friend and was getting ready to leave so I could prowl over at the Most Beautiful Home Depot in the World on 23rd St (genius!).
While making my rounds of goodbyes, I was talking with some ladies about this project, and I mentioned that I had hoped to meet someone at the hockey party, but to no avail. They both nodded toward Yummy. I gave them the gurrrrl shrug, and noticed that the person next to me at the bar was the man I mentioned earlier. I looked at them and nodded toward him with a question and they smiled back and nodded, so I just about-faced and started talking to him. (Take note of all that non-verbal girl-code!)(also note the importance of not overthinking the action!) It was not a graceful entrance, but we definitely had some sparks and he was very cute with a sexy hockey scar above his eyebrow. We kind of asked each other out and replied yes at the same time, ADORBS! And then we both had to leave. I think this still counts as me asking out someone who I was certain was out of reach, even if he was asking me out simultaneously. I hope he recorded my phone number correctly! As I was exiting the bar and floating through the crowd, I noticed that almost all of them turned to look at me, reflecting back that light I could feel swirling out from behind my eyes. In a small, secret way, I was moved and inspired by myself- and that is magic. Back to Earth, I noticed the irony of the song that was playing as I left:
Let this not be an ominous foreshadow!
Honestly I don’t know how it would happen that my first 2 days were so charmed, though I suspect it has something to do with chemistry in me that has changed as a result of feeling invigorated by this challenge. It’s no secret that confidence is attractive, and doing this requires me to go into every situation with a confidence and an openness that I was not emanating before. Friends and family noticed something different about me, something radiating from the inside out. I’m into it. In talking with some friends this morning, I was reminded that every move we make in the direction of our dreams is reciprocated and supported by the universe- it’s energetic, it’s nature, it is just so. So let it be.
xxx
no i do not love you 